Jagged Banquet

Remembered a glimmering sight;
Mom went out for Mass that night.
I woke beneath a bed net’s weave,
upon a woven mat of sleep.

I might be sick
or maybe not.
There seemed to be a hint
of hidden chocolates.

Why do we prepare on Christmas Eve,
when we’re given the choice
to either sleep or eat,
why do we still feast?

There are gifts, but given early,
no hugs, no kisses,
no feeling
just the same routine.

I don’t envy new clothes,
I don’t envy fine plates.
Why are we different,
even angry at singing?

On Christmas Day,
it feels dampened by rain.
We sit at a jagged banquet,
just to feel we’ve joined in.

I don’t want this.
I don’t want those.
I just wish things were different
when we still had the choice.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

i hope this message finds you well

Good day! I hope this message finds you well.  I am writing to inform you that... I was unwell. Struggling and unable. Anxious, sad, but not depressed. Agoraphobic. Still wasn't healed. When you said you overcame yours in just two weeks You always call to gather us, for some guidance, catch-ups When you're just wasting our time with your memoirs This meeting could've been an email.  I tried. I tried, trust me. For me, it was nothing.  There are factors we can't control. Sucking it all up makes you gasp for air. I chased your time for some advice, for some comfort.  From 8 AM, I sat down with you at 1 PM.  Expecting a father or a leader. "As long as you have time for sleeping, as long as you have time for eating, as long as you have time for bathing, you haven't sacrificed things, you've not given it all." Those words killed me. Your face terrified me. Your voice makes me want silence. Your presence makes me seek solace. Your intelligence redefines the ...
Read more

Sixth Month

Started from a tease, ended in a mess. Luckily mended, now we’re living managed. Back in the days, focused, unhazed. At your house, we awkwardly loitered. Been good, been bad, but to me, with a lot balancing life in the scholarship’s light. I may not be sweet, I will always forget, but know that disorder torments me and will forever. Not tried to kiss you, haven’t tried to touch you, ’cause gossip behind the registrar’s will dim a pilgrim to Rome’s stars. I’m letting you thrive like a rose not being picked. This is not neglect, this is respect. Now walking on different roads, chasing different buses, but true love never fades it reforms, it just changes.  
Read more

Pisces

Without fences, without alarms, with my diopters on the moon and the other on your becoming. I’ve been walking longer, you’re walking faster. I reached this version of myself a little earlier than you will. I could warn you and steer the boat. I could tell you where the storms live. But love, the kind I carry, knows when to loosen its grip. So, I say, go. Touch the fire. Miss the rain. Fall too fast. Do what you must do. Do what you have to experience. I won’t interrupt your lessons with my conclusions. I won’t turn your mistakes into my fears. I will be here, quiet as water, patient as age. I might be forgetful, but I do stay. And if you choose to let me go, I will return to deeper waters.  
Read more